Death. By choice.

Got to know of sad demise of one of my colleagues' mother. Sometimes the Grim Reaper comes as a shock and almost always he comes uninvited. But this time, he was one sought out visitor (though still I feel an unwelcome one, when finally he would have arrived)- the departed was one weary fighter after long battle with pain.

I remember how few days back my colleague had told of her mother's situation- "my mother is dying". Not as an event, but as an action- not as in 'this is happening to her', but more as 'she is doing it'. Indeed then she explained that too much pain caused by cancer has made her to decide to end her life. In the Netherlands this is allowed (euthanasia).At that time, she was looking for an appointment with the specialist doctor to make this happen. Appointment! To die?!!

I know of my own family members, who in last few days, were forced to wish for death due to pain. Also, I remember my friend Gert, who when he got to know that he had cancer, decided not not to go for chemo. His was a choice for better quality of life though for fewer days- he reasoned that chemo would make him live an extra few months, but would make his health deteriorate so badly that those would not be days worth living. And now, now I hear of this lady, who consciously took an appointment to end her world. How much strength and rational thinking is needed to make such a decision, and how much will power is needed to stick to it? Because life would start tempting you again towards her, the moment you return to occasional lucid moments from your morphine induced slumbers!!

Farewell o departed, though we know not where you go. And I wish strength to all those you leave behind. In life, I hope I can someday be as resolute as you showed yourself to be in death. And may your tale make me and my loved ones and your loved ones, live life more fully.
                   पश्येम शरदः शतं|
                   जीवेम शरदः शतं|
                   श्रुणुयाम शरदः शतं||

As for death, I think I can just pray as so many have done before me
                अनायासेन मरणं, विना दैन्यें जीवनं!!